Thursday, October 27, 2011

Wedding gown DIY - Lydia Deetz

If you're looking for an awesome, wedding-related Halloween costume, look no further than your local thrift store. Crafty person Mizerella took an ugly, outdated wedding gown and sprayed it blood red to look like the childbride wedding gown from Beetlejuice.

You know what I mean:

She spray painted a gown with fabric paint, and then used red tulle (ahh, tulle: every bridesmaid's worst friend) to add a veil, and some texture to the dress.

I have personally used this type of paint. It's easy to work with, but the pump spray will give you some nasty hand cramps if you have to use it a lot.

Check out her results!

It looks a bit like a waitress uniform at a Mexican restaurant until...

Veil and creepy make-up!

This is a great craft. I'll bet it could be done in a few days if you're looking for a gotta-have-it costume before Monday. Maybe I'll do this next year?

Happy Spooky Weekend!


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

'Til death, and beyond

This story is romantic, and a bit macabre - perfect for the almost-Halloween season.

The skeletal remains of a Roman-era couple reveal the pair has been holding hands for 1,500 years.

Italian archaeologists say the man and woman were buried at the same time between the 5th and 6th century A.D. in central-northern Italy. Wearing a bronze ring, the woman is positioned so she appears to be gazing at her male partner.

The two skeletons, which are poorly preserved, will be now studied by Giorgio Gruppioni, an anthropologist at the University of Bologna. The research includes establishing the couple's age, their relationship and the possible cause of death.

"We believe that they were originally buried with their faces staring into each other. The position of the man's vertebrae suggests that his head rolled after death," Donato Labate, the director of the excavation at the archaeological superintendency of Emilia-Romagna, told Discovery News.

In 2007 another skeleton couple, buried between 5,000 and 6,000 years ago, was found at a neolithic site near Mantua, just 25 miles south of Verona, where Shakespeare set the romantic story of Romeo and Juliet.

"In antiquity, it is not surprising to learn of spouses or members of a family dying at the same time: whenever epidemics such as the Black Plague ravaged Europe, one member of the family would often die while the family was trying to bury another member," Kristina Killgrove, a biological anthropologist at the University of North Carolina, told Discovery News.

Locked in a tender embrace, they also looked at one another in apparent defiance of time and decay.

"The two couples are separated in time by five millennia, and both evoke an uplifting tenderness. I have been involved in many digs, but I've never felt so moved," Labate said.

According to Killgrove, the positioning of the Modena skeletons, looking at one another and holding hands, indeed suggests they may have been a couple.

"Whoever buried these people likely felt that communicating their relationship was just as important in death as it was in life," Killgrove said.

Am I sick (don't answer that), or is the picture really heart-warming? Look at those two - they really loved each other! Or, more realistically, they really learned to tolerate each other's annoying habits.

Friday, October 21, 2011


A couple in Oakland have decided to continue with their wedding plans to marry on the Oakland courthouse steps, despite the Occupy Oakland protest. Latrina Rhinehart and Matheo Chavez - great-nephew of Cesar Chavez - aren't bothered by the protesters because the couple supports them. Also, they're a super-cute couple!

View more videos at:

The protesters say that they're honored to be included in the ceremony.


Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Goth wedding gowns

Check out these gorgeous black-and-gothy wedding gowns from Vera Wang. Is all the zombie and Twilight popularity with the normies making Goth mainstream?

It looks like gray tulle under a black gown. How depressingly romantic!

The gown on the left looks like something out of a 19th century London period-piece movie. The gown on the right is my obsession.

I love the corset/bustle style on this one. If I had to choose from these gowns, this is the one I favor the most because it has so much structure.

I wish there was more detail - the mermaid style with fluffy stuff is so gorgeous!

These dresses make me miss the funny dancing at the Goth/Industrial clubs back in the good old days. Can't you just see these girls stomping it out on the dancefloor - eyeliner running and cigarette dangling from hand? HAHA.


Monday, October 17, 2011

How to be a good wedding guest

Maybe you've read my piece on planning a wedding without looking like an asshole, or post-wedding don'ts. Since I'm so fond of dispensing unsolicited wedding advice, I thought I'd write a little something about how to be a good wedding guest. I just attended a really beautiful wedding, and being the judgmental bitch that I am, I couldn't help but notice some judge-able wedding guests.

Rule #1 (and the most important rule): BE ON TIME. Seriously. Leave your house thirty minutes earlier than you need to, and be prepared to sit around for a while. A lot of care and planning went into the evening, the least you can do is be in your place before the bride comes out. If you show up right before the bride, you'll be standing around looking awkward, and generally detracting from the important vow exchange that's about to take place.

Obvious rule is obvious: don't be a drunk asshole

Rule #2: Wait your turn. The bride and groom will get to you when they get to you. You're not at the wedding to hang out with the couple, you're there to support them. If they need you, they'll ask for you. If they don't, they'll just come by and say hi, and you can see them again another time. If you're an out-of-town guest then the couple should spend a little extra time with you, but if you see these friends on a regular basis, don't expect a lot of face time.

Rule #3: Don't compare the day to your own wedding. If you have a funny story that is about weddings, that's okay, but don't brag about how great or how much more expensive your special day was. It's not the right time for your stories of self-indulgence, it's a day to celebrate the newlyweds.

I'm sure there are roughly 1000 more wedding guest don'ts, but they're probably all common sense things like "send back the RSVP card on time" and "dress appropriately". Everyone knows those things, and if they don't they're jerks!


Friday, October 14, 2011

Super awesome wedding invitations

Lately, I've been playing Super Mario World - a game I had TWENTY years ago. I still get suck on Tubular in the special levels. Right? Back me up on how hard that level is.


Check out this awesome wedding package from Larry T Quach. The invitations, seating chart, place cards, and wedding favors are all taken from elements of the Nintendo classic Super Mario Brothers.

The cartridge invitation comes in a black sleeve. I'd totally forgotten about the sleeves until I saw this.

Open up the invitation for the information and a look at the game "works".

These were the wedding favors.

Inside is a little card. Don't take the heart, Mario! Lakitu's gifts are always a ruse.

And this is the card that guests use to mark which meal they chose - ha! I love it.

There are a ton more photos, plus explanation from the designer at the source.


Wednesday, October 12, 2011

I Hate Weddings

I recently found this site: I Hate Weddings. The writer really, really hates weddings, and his friends (I presume). I can't blame him. As much as I love weddings, I hate the self-indulgent attitude that some couples adopt.

Here are some of my favorites:

I don't think I have ever RSVPed for a wedding. Not RSVPing used to be my way of forcing friends who disappeared off the face of the Earth after they got engaged to call me. Oh? Joe hasn't had the time to call anyone back since his three engagement parties? Not RSVPing will force Joe or his fiance to call you.

My other friend "Barney" and his wife refused to call people who weren't RSVPing. Instead "Mrs. Barney" sent RSVP "overdue notices" and "final warning" letters. After the "final warning" letter she just assumed the invitees weren't coming. I don't know if any invitees who missed the "final warning" showed up to their wedding anyway.

If I see this at your wedding, I will punch you.

Wedding Gift Calculator (my favorite!):
The biggest chore for a wedding guest is to decide how much money to put in the envelope. Not all weddings are equal. Therefore every couple getting married does not deserve the same gift. When giving a gift for a wedding there are many factors you should consider so that you don't look cheap and more importantly so that you don't give too much.

When you give cash is to remember to give it at the end of the reception. This gives you a chance to have fun and look at how much work the bride and groom put into the event. It also gives you a chance to consider how much work YOU put into the event. Remember, its not the gift, it’s the thought that counts. If you put a lot of thought into a wedding . . . you should give money.

I start off with a base figure of $75.00.

You brought a date to the wedding.
Add $75.00

You were invited to bring a date but couldn't find one.
Add $25.00

You were not invited to bring a date.
Subtract $25.00

You were not invited to bring a date but brought one anyway.
Add $5.00

Open Bar for alcohol
Add $25.00

Cash Bar for alcohol
(*Ask for a receipt every time you order a drink. Deduct the total amount of money you spent on alcohol. Then put the receipts in the envelope with your gift)

Dinner is served Buffet Style
Subtract $10.00

The reception is a Denny's Breakfast buffet.
Subtract $20.00

Cash Bar for soda **
(**If they charge you for soda at the wedding DO NOT GIVE A GIFT. Immediately,
go to the bride, kick her in the shin and then go home.)

HAHAHA. There's a more detailed list of wedding gift calculations at the link.

It's safe to say that this guy's friends do NOT follow my rules for getting married without being an asshole.


Photo found via another funny site.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Steve Jobs and Laurene Powell

As you're surely heard by now, Steve Jobs died yesterday.

Jobs was married for twenty years, until his death, so let's look at his married life.

Steve Jobs an Laurene Powell wed on March 18, 1991 at the Awahnee Hotel in Yosemite National park. Jobs was Buddhist (I assume she was too?) so their ceremony was officiated by a Zen Buddhist monk. The two met at Stanford University when he was speaking to a class.

The Awahnee Hotel - it's gorgeous!

Looking cute and crunchy.

I don't know if this is actually their wedding photo, but it's obviously an early photo of the two.

Jobs has four children - three with Powell, and one with another woman from his early life, Chrisann Brennan.

Here's a more recent photo of Jobs and Powell
I love that an innovative man wore the exact same clothes all the time.

In addition to being married, Steve Jobs once performed the service of Wedding Photographer at Larry Ellison's marriage to Melanie Craft in 2003. And I'd bet that a huge percentage of professional wedding photographers use Mac computers and software.

Thanks for the productivity and time-wasting devices, Steve.


Source: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Angela from The Office got married

She's not real, but since I watch embarrassing amounts of Office re-runs, I was excited when Angela got married. Maybe "excited" isn't right - Angela's a stone-cold bitch. What is her problem, right?! Why is she so rude to everyone, and why would anyone groom her cat with her tongue? Gross. I guess the writers are setting Angela up for failure since The Senator - the man Angela married - is super gay. This was confirmed by Oscar and Ryan, and it blew Pam's little mind since she only knows two gay people.

Anyway, if you're an Office addict like me, you'll be interested to see these stock photographs that NBC posted on their website instead of filming a webisode devoted to Angela's wedding (humph).

This was one of the most notable summers of my life. My tabby cat Noodles had kittens. And oh yes, no big deal... I got married to the Senator!!!

I wanted to hire a planner, but Robert had so many visions for the wedding that I didn't need to! He even chose my dress from a photo he saw in Vanity Fair. [Because he is gay! Don't let it hit you in the head.]

The guest list was very high society. Everyone from Ted Brown (D-NJ) to Maria Leahy (R-MN) came. Michael Reed (R-FL) said our crostini was the best he ever had. [I'd firebomb my own wedding if politicians showed up, but status is important to Angela.]

The band was wonderful, and we had such a good time dancing to Blondie and Chaka Kahn covers at Robert's request. Everyone enjoyed it, especially his assistant.

My expensive, elegant wedding may not have suited every woman, say Pam or Phyllis, but it was perfect for me. I'm looking forward to a long, fruitful marriage.

I'm really curious to see how Angela's baby changes things. Will Angela ever discover that The Senator is gay? And will it end in divorce? Angela is so religious, it seems like she'd never allow herself to be divorced, but churchy types tend to be the most hypocritical, so maybe divorce is okay when she does it. I noticed that Angela's wardrobe was less conservative now that she's "little pregs". Is marriage changing Angela as a person?

Is it possible I'm over-thinking this television program?

Answer: No, it is not.